#6:Submit your letter of resignationdue to an extramarital affair the same week that Newsweek runs a profile on you. (WAIT WHAT??!)
UPDATE: More details from USA Today.
According to Slate, the author of this article I screenshotted above, Paula Broadwell, was the person Petraeus had an affair with. She was also the author of a recent book about him.
Wow.
Hahaha, are you fucking kidding me?